My "Out" Week" : Conclusion
Ok so this post took way longer than it should have to get up (but let's be honest, who's really surprised by that?). I got the flu and spent a few days in misery... so I caved in and watched some Spongebob. Because if you're gonna go off your diet, make sure it's for something really worth the mind-calories, right? So I had to do a couple of make-up days after that.
My conclusion at the end of this week was that I didn't notice much of a difference, besides flashbacks to childhood when my parents would go on a purge and throw out all my brother's Thomas the Tank Engine DVDs and the copy of Sleepover my sisters and I co-owned. (I swear, we must have bought and thrown away that DVD at least five times.) When I took fiction out of my life, a hundred other things rushed in to fill the gaps. The fact is that as a child, I wallowed in boredom. I had endless free time, being home schooled and largely friendless, and I hated my life. I wrote to escape. I read to escape.
But I don't want to escape anymore. My life is not a bleak and barren wasteland.
My conclusion at the end of this week was that I didn't notice much of a difference, besides flashbacks to childhood when my parents would go on a purge and throw out all my brother's Thomas the Tank Engine DVDs and the copy of Sleepover my sisters and I co-owned. (I swear, we must have bought and thrown away that DVD at least five times.) When I took fiction out of my life, a hundred other things rushed in to fill the gaps. The fact is that as a child, I wallowed in boredom. I had endless free time, being home schooled and largely friendless, and I hated my life. I wrote to escape. I read to escape.
But I don't want to escape anymore. My life is not a bleak and barren wasteland.
(0:53-1:16)
There's a fairly prevalent myth about artists, and how tortured they have to be before they can produce anything. Before you ask, though, I will not be trying out a week of torture to see if that sparks any ideas.
What I did learn through this week was that one of the best things I can do for my writing is just to never stop thinking and trying and failing and picking up and trying again. Never let it fade into the background. Stop making it a C priority. If writing is what I want out of life, then some not-insignificant portion of my waking hours should be spent pursuing it. It's never going to happen to me. It's something I have to do. So whatever I can do to make myself think about it-- give up TV, force myself to read more or not at all, go hide in a cabin with a typewriter and no electricity for a week-- it's all good stuff. It's all in pursuit of what I care about.
I am sorry I didn't come up with more spectacular results, though. I'm sorry there wasn't an easy, quick solution that I could patent and teach you in Fifteen Simple Steps! And I'm very sorry, for my own sake, that I'm still so blocked.
Maybe I should head back to the goat farm.
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