It's Like We’re the Only People Alive: Why Destined Romances are Boring

I looked across the room and suddenly, I saw him; he was tall, with dark hair, pale skin, and deep blue eyes. I knew instantly that he was the one for me, and that no power on Earth could keep me from him.

Zzzzzzz.

That's when I would put the book down. Love at first sight? It's been done to death. Too many pop-culture love stories start out with this basic formula: boy meets girl. In their fictional world, they are the only people for each other, and the only thing keeping them apart are the various obstacles the author thinks up. These are the love-at-first-sight stories, the destiny stories, the instant attraction where the rest of the people on the planet pale in comparison (think Bella and Edward). Some people may swoon over this, but for me, these love stories just aren't satisfying. The great love stories, the ones I really root for, are the ones where you can't tell for sure who the hero or heroine will end up with; there's no one person who immediately jumps out and goes "Booga booga booga! Love me!" That doubt allows the reader to think that they are the ones coming up with the idea for these two characters to end up together, and that's what makes them really want it.

Think of how we fall in love in real life. Would you be drawn to a person who was endlessly pursuing you, writing you love poems after knowing you one day, staring at you all ga-ga and professing their undying commitment before they even knew you the slightest bit? Would that be appealing? No! It would feel gross and weird and fake, because they can't possibly love you; they don't even know you! And even if they somehow did truly love you, they haven't given you any time to love them. You don't know them; you don't know if you'd get along with them or fight, if they have interesting or stupid things to say, or if the way their nose whistles when they breathe is endearing, or makes you want to murder them with a pen. I realize that in fiction, things are simplified, and that's fine. Your characters, though, still need to be believable as people; they need to have flaws and good sides, quirks and pet peeves. They need to have foot odor. Ok, not specifically foot odor. My point is that love between two real people--two flawed, imperfect, foot-smelly people--is what's beautiful, what's real and compelling and worth reading about. And real people fall in love slowly.

One of my favorite love stories is the romance that unfolds in Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre (when I dissed on Bronte in yesterday's post, I was referring to the oh-so-melodramatic Emily). In Jane Eyre, you know the heroine's personality, hopes and dreams, and tragic history before her love interest comes along, so you are more invested in her happiness. I'm not suggesting that you lead off your story with basically 200 pages of backstory—that would never fly in today's market—but the point is, as soon as Jane met Mr. Rochester, I could feel the chemistry between them. They clicked, had an energy that was new in Jane's life, and in the book.

 I didn't think that they were going to end up together, though; he was so much older, and of a higher class, and I assumed the idea never would have occurred to a straight-laced Victorian author (little did I know, at the time, just how twisted the Brontes were!). That doubt, whether the possibility would be explored or not, was what compelled me to keep reading, to keep eating up their every moment together—because I wanted it to happen. Nobody had to stare into each other's eyes and swoon and go on and on about how they were destined to be together. I just knew it, and I worried that they would miss out on it.

Like the Death Cab for Cutie song says, "Fear is the heart of love". If there's never any real danger of the two characters not ending up together, I'm never going to be rooting for it as hard, wanting it as much.

This isn't just a one-book phenomenon, either; many of the most enduring love stories feature unlikely pairings—Benedick and Beatrice from Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing, for example, or Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy, or Joey and Pacey from Dawson’s Creek. Not that Dawson's Creek is an enduring epic. But when you're starting your romance novel, keep this in mind; show a rich world, with many possibilities, and let the reader root for your couple on their own.

What's your favorite love story? Do you like the idea of love at first sight? Am I crazy-cakes? Let me know, and have a great Wednesday!