Taking Ownership
Hey guys! Happy New Year! One of my resolutions this year is to blog more often (although, no promises, I am taking 18 credits after all). But I'm kicking things off properly by posting today!
So over this break, I went through (am going through) a bit of a hard time. This isn't a personal blog, so I'm not going to get into all the hairy details. All that matters is that I had to put my self-respect above my love and affection for someone very important to me, and end a relationship that I believe was becoming destructive to me. While I don't regret my decision to walk away from this person, it was and is very painful, and it's been really hard on me.
But so what? That's life, right? Some things weren't meant to last forever. I always like to say that when you're a writer, there are no bad experiences; everything that happens is either a good thing, or material. Not that pleasant experiences can't be material, but they aren't nearly as compelling or useful as horrible, painful, heart-breaking, soul-rending ones. There's a reason most of the well-known artists in history had tragic lives.
Don't be afraid to use your own experience in writing! It can seem intimidating at first, especially if there's a chance the person you're writing about might see what you've written and be offended, or feel the need to put forth their own take on the events you wrote about. But so what? Good writing--good art--isn't about relaying facts; it's about telling the truth, as you see it, as you feel it. Think of art like a dream: the things you dream about aren't real. You can't actually ride a magic monkey into the clouds and shower the world with rainbow-candy, and you didn't actually make out with Adam Levine last night. But the things that dream allowed you to feel? The wonder, the excitement, the thrill, the love, the joy, the lust? All of those things are real. You really did feel those things, and they were what made the dream seem real.
Take ownership of your story. Sure, other people might tell you it went differently, or that it's not an appropriate story to tell, or that you're just plain crazy. So what? If we all saw life exactly the same way, we wouldn't need to communicate like we do. That's what's fascinating about writing: peeking into someone else's head, seeing the world from a stranger's eyes, if only for a moment. When we share our pain, our joys, our experiences and impressions with each other, that's how we know we aren't alone.
And who wants to be alone?
I wrote a poem about claiming the right to talk about things that happen to us, and I thought I'd share. (Don't worry, it's short.)
All Rights Reserved (by Emily Pryor)
Since you deny
any authorship
in this heartbreak, I claim
copyright,
trademark,
movie rights and poetic license.
You are your own.
Wish granted.
But what you did to me
is mine.
So go forth, my ducklings! Waddle out into 2013 with a new perspective on life: there is no bad, there are only good and interesting.
So over this break, I went through (am going through) a bit of a hard time. This isn't a personal blog, so I'm not going to get into all the hairy details. All that matters is that I had to put my self-respect above my love and affection for someone very important to me, and end a relationship that I believe was becoming destructive to me. While I don't regret my decision to walk away from this person, it was and is very painful, and it's been really hard on me.
But so what? That's life, right? Some things weren't meant to last forever. I always like to say that when you're a writer, there are no bad experiences; everything that happens is either a good thing, or material. Not that pleasant experiences can't be material, but they aren't nearly as compelling or useful as horrible, painful, heart-breaking, soul-rending ones. There's a reason most of the well-known artists in history had tragic lives.
Don't be afraid to use your own experience in writing! It can seem intimidating at first, especially if there's a chance the person you're writing about might see what you've written and be offended, or feel the need to put forth their own take on the events you wrote about. But so what? Good writing--good art--isn't about relaying facts; it's about telling the truth, as you see it, as you feel it. Think of art like a dream: the things you dream about aren't real. You can't actually ride a magic monkey into the clouds and shower the world with rainbow-candy, and you didn't actually make out with Adam Levine last night. But the things that dream allowed you to feel? The wonder, the excitement, the thrill, the love, the joy, the lust? All of those things are real. You really did feel those things, and they were what made the dream seem real.
Take ownership of your story. Sure, other people might tell you it went differently, or that it's not an appropriate story to tell, or that you're just plain crazy. So what? If we all saw life exactly the same way, we wouldn't need to communicate like we do. That's what's fascinating about writing: peeking into someone else's head, seeing the world from a stranger's eyes, if only for a moment. When we share our pain, our joys, our experiences and impressions with each other, that's how we know we aren't alone.
And who wants to be alone?
I wrote a poem about claiming the right to talk about things that happen to us, and I thought I'd share. (Don't worry, it's short.)
All Rights Reserved (by Emily Pryor)
Since you deny
any authorship
in this heartbreak, I claim
copyright,
trademark,
movie rights and poetic license.
You are your own.
Wish granted.
But what you did to me
is mine.
So go forth, my ducklings! Waddle out into 2013 with a new perspective on life: there is no bad, there are only good and interesting.
That...
ReplyDeletewas...
inspiring!